Transformative Change: Honesty, Responsibility, Courage, Humility

From the introduction to Transformative Change: Honesty, Responsibility, Courage, Humility, by Michael Misja and JoAnn Shade

If you’re reading these words, perhaps it’s because something has kicked open the door for you and you’re ready to embrace change. It isn’t enough to appreciate change from afar, or only in the abstract, or as something that can happen to other people but not to you. We need to create change for ourselves, in a workable way, as part of our everyday lives.

Sharon Salzberg

In 1974, a Hungarian sculptor and professor of architecture invented a three-dimensional puzzle that captured the attention of the world. Not only has Erno Rubik's creation been phenomenally successful commercially, selling 350 million Rubik's Cubes, but it has also taught us a great many life lessons. In working on a book on transformative change, we found these three truths from the Rubik's Cube invaluable: Some things cannot be changed, you can never change just one thing, and you have to give up what you have to get what you want.

What is true about Rubik’s cubes, people in general and relationships in particular is also true about writing a book. Neither of us was too fond of group projects in elementary school, and so collaborating on a book brought its own challenges to us. What could we agree on? When could we agree to disagree? Could we somehow present a united message yet still maintain our own distinct voices?

The writing process itself confirmed again what we believe about change. It takes motivation, intentional effort, and the presence of the Spirit of God. It also verified the truths from the Rubik’s Cube, especially the understanding that you can never change just one thing. So it is with much gratitude for the grace of God that we are able to birth a book on the process of change.

When we first sat down to work on this project, we reflected on the lives of the hundreds of people we had worked with over our many years of ministry. As we talked about those who had made substantive changes in their lives, particularly in what might be seen as holistic ways, we asked ourselves, what made the difference for them? What did they do, what did they understand about change, and why was it different for them? Why did we see a transformation in them versus less significant change in other people?

Our conversations brought us over and over again to the concepts of honesty, personal responsibility, courage and humility. When people were committed to make the shift toward those four values/goals, and were accompanied in that work by the Spirit of God, they were able to move toward a spiritual and psychological transformation with lasting impact. Thus the framework of this book on transformative change in the life of a person who follows Christ.

These pages have had a long gestation period, and our own lives have experienced transitions that have put our thinking about transformative change to the test. We write from a place of recognition as to what can be, not a place where we’ve been able to live out these concepts perfectly in our own lives. Yet we also write from a place of practical experience in the roles of Christian psychologist and faith-based social service practitioner and pastor, having walked the road of transformative change with hundreds of people.

We’ve included some ways for you to interact with these materials at the end of each chapter in Shiftwork, questions and activities that will be helpful in putting the concepts of this book into action. Hopefully these will nudge you toward the question, “now what?” as you desire to move from deception to honesty, from shame and blame to personal responsibility, from fear to courage, and from pride to humility.

What we also know is that Salzberg’s words about embracing change that we began this introduction with are only part of the equation for those who follow Christ. We do need to create change for ourselves, but lasting, transformative change is always in the context of what Christ is doing in us. As Paul wrote to the Corinthians two thousand years ago, “And so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him” (II Corinthians 3, MSG).

And so, with the light of truth, the acceptance of personal responsibility, the courage that comes from faith, and the humility of Christ, we breathe a prayer from the psalmist for ourselves and for you, our fellow-seeker of transformative change.

Send out your light and your truth,

let them lead me,

let them bring me to your holy hill

and to your dwelling.

Psalm 43:3

https://www.createspace.com/4885251

Olympic Reflections

While it may not reach the dramatic heights of Storage Wars, the games of the 30^th Olympiad have shown us the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat over the last two weeks.  Who will be the fastest man, the fastest woman in the world?  Who will win tonight?   Good thing the games are over this weekend – this could become addictive.

 I’m going on record: that was one bizarre opening celebration.  I couldn’t figure out why Abe Lincoln kept showing up, discovering later that it was actually British actor Kenneth Branagh portraying Isambard Kingdom Brunel , instrumental in the early days of the Industrial Revolution. 

I do have a pet peeve about the television coverage of the ceremony – I know that commercials are needed to broadcast the games, but couldn’t they suspend them for the athletes’ entrance to the stadium?  Family members and friends around the world tune in for one glimpse of their beloved athlete, only to go to commercial break when they’re next in line.  Reminds me of the year our son was in the Rose Bowl Parade.  

London 2012 was a far cry from the opening ceremonies at the London Olympics in 1948, which featured brass bands, the entrance of the royal family, and (probably) long-winded speeches.  It was Lord Burghley who set the tone for the XIV Olympiad, the first to be held after the end of World War II, believing that the 1948 Olympics would serve as a "warm flame of hope for a better understanding in the world which has burned so low.” 

How times have changed since 1948.  As highlighted in the recent Title IX series on the sports pages of the Times-Gazette, the doors for women in sports have gradually been pried open since 1948.  One favorite of the 1948 games was the Dutch sprinter Fanny Blankers-Koen, nicknamed "The Flying Housewife."  This 30-year old mother of two children won four gold medals in athletics, and it’s likely she would have racked up gold in the long jump and high jump as well, but female athletes were limited to participation in 3 individual events in those days. 

In 1948, 3714 male athletes competed in the Olympics, with only 390 female athletes involved in the games.  Now, in 2012, 4862 female athletes joined the 6098 male participants, and nearly all the events have categories for both men and women – only rhythmic gymnastics and synchronized swimming are female only.    

I’ve been awed by the performances of the athletes but not inspired to take up boxing or marathon swimming.   However, my 6 and 8 year old nephews caught the Olympic bug, perfecting their dives (jumps) into the pool and convincing their uncle to drag Grandpa’s ping pong table from the basement to the garage.  Both born in Korea, they plan to claim dual citizenship and beat China in 2024!  

As the athletes proudly marched into the London stadium two weeks ago, many had their eyes on the prize, the gold at the end of the rainbow, yet most will go home empty-handed.  All that training, all that sacrifice – all for naught.  That certainly is one way to look at it. 

But ask Sarah or Oscar about that.  Sarah Attar ran for Saudi Arabia wearing a hijab, finishing last in her 800 meter heat to an ovation from the crowd.  Oscar Pistorius, aka “the Blade Runner,” competed on artificial limbs in the 400 meter race, making it into the semi-final.  Sarah and Oscar may not be bringing medals home, but their courage will glow long into the future of the Olympic heritage.   

While their stories are in the headlines of the Olympic world, each athlete who enters the stadium for the closing ceremonies on Sunday has his or her own story of dreams and disappointments, of tears of frustration and tears of joy.  But in the festive gathering at the close of these Olympic games, they’ll pose for pictures with new-found friends, exchanging the challenge of competition for the camaraderie of the broader Olympic story.  For them, and for us, the Olympics have provided “a warm flame of hope for a better understanding in the world.”  Just think, only 4 years ‘til Rio!